In the monastic tradition, the beginning of a new year often invokes the asking and giving of a “word.” Unfortunately, my Spiritual Director passed away this year and I’m on my own in the discernment of a word. The last word he gave me was “liminal.” Liminal is about being in one state while transitioning into another. I’m not there anymore, I have transitioned into that new state. Yet the word “liminal” was a gift to open my heart and transform my thinking while I went through a period of deep struggles.
For this season moderation keeps coming to mind. I have always struggled with a lack of moderation. I over fill, I over use, I over share, I drive too fast, I overdo most things, generally being driven to achieve and get things done. My younger sister shares this issue – so I wonder “what happened in our childhood that caused this lack of moderations?”
What is at the root? I look at my teapot. Tea spilt on the tray and my tea cozy is stained with overflowing tea. Too much cinnamon added this morning – carelessly. It’s everywhere. My chronic back pain is from insisting that I do things myself, carry too much, refusing to ask for help. I over cook most food – always, I spill – always. It’s like I don’t know when to stop or why I should. Is there some odd fear of not getting enough? missing out? Is it merely an issue of not paying attention? Or am I just slopping? (as my father always said)
My massage therapist suggests “balance” as my word. But I want to off-load things, most things. I don’t want balance, I want less. So, I asked Siri, “define moderation.”
She replied in her dry monotone voice: “Moderation is the avoidance of excess or extremes. The action of making something less extreme.”
Actively making things less extreme! Ok, how do you do that? Maybe I do have some control over this. “Avoidance of” and “the action of.” To avoid and to take action. As I’ve been musing with this idea, it is curious that the word moderation showed up in a reading in church a few Sundays ago.
“Let your moderation be known unto all mankind.” Phil 4:5
To be known for my moderation. That’s a lovely thought, but it will take some work. So, in we go – a deep dive into original languages and other translations.
The original Greek = epieikes; seeming, suitable, equitable, fair, mild, patient, and gentle. Humm, gentle. Not a word that I usually use to describe myself. Other English versions of the Bible translate this work epieikes into graciousness, forbearance, considerate, gentle behavior, gentle spirit, and simply gentle.
A tall order from someone who struggles to NOT overfill her tea pot. But as this word persists in my consciousness, I will embrace it. This will involve slowing down, being present, and working to avoid excesses and extremes. I’m not sure what this means, but I know this is possible with the help of a loving God who does desire moderation for me. A gift for a new year, help to become more moderate, to become more gentle, ultimately to become more Christlike.
What about you? Have you mused on your word for the next season? Reach out to someone who knows you. Those in our lives often know what we need before we know ourselves.